3 am

There is only so much you can or WANT to do at 3 am with a house of peaceful sleepers, I am tired. Very tired. Yet sleep eludes me. And when it comes it refuses to stay.

I am stressed. I know that. I even know what stresses me so much. IT is many little things, a few big things. Personal and medical matters. IT all amounts to one thing. Me sleeping poorly. I have no control over these things and I wish I could let go of them long enough to sleep for a few hours, but they even follow me into my dreams.

It is hard to focus when you are sleep deprived. I turn to food when sleep deprived. I have gained almost 10 lbs in just 5 weeks. I cry frequently. Mostly from exhaustion. I suck it up and keep going. I have said no to more than one thing lately, but I am afraid not to enough things.

I take things one task at a time. What else can I do.